In the interest of fun and democracy, I thought we’d post some current jokes about both of the presidential candidates. Hope you enjoy!

Barack Obama Jokes:
(Courtesy of this site)

Q. Why won’t Obama release his real birth certificate?

A. It got mixed in with his Rezko mortgage records and shredded.

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Like any experienced Chicago politician, Obama would go the cemetary to register voters. One night he came across a grave so old and worn that he couldn’t make out the name on the tombstone. The staffer holding the flashlight got impatient and suggested they just move on to the next plot. Obama angrily exclaimed, “This person has a much right to vote as anyone else here!”

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“People looking into Barack Obama’s campaign contributions say that Obama may have received $3.3 million from abroad. Yeah. It turns out that broad is Oprah Winfrey.” –Conan O’Brien

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Obama’s so pretty….

Obama is so pretty that Bill Clinton wants to intern for him.

Obama is so pretty that he won’t ride in Ted Kennedy’s car

Obama is so pretty that he would even look good in a Hillary pantsuit

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“After his big speech in North Carolina today, Senator Joe Biden said he was experiencing a sore throat and lost his voice. Boy, the good news doesn’t stop for Barack Obama. Just one lucky break after another.” –Jay Leno

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Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Well, for example, the other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said to him, ‘Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break’?

He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a ‘Nazi.’ He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a ‘doughnut eating Gestapo.’ He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket.

This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn’t care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said, ‘Obama in ’08 .’ I try to have a little fun each day now that I’m retired. It’s important to my health.

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Jokes credit: The Barack Obama Jokes Website <-- You can click there to read the ones I couldn’t print!

All’s fair in love, war and politics! What about the other side?

McCain / Palin Jokes:
(Courtesy of this site)

A woman at a John McCain rally said that Barack Obama is an Arab. And McCain quickly corrected her. It was really awkward, because McCain had to tell her, ‘Look, Governor Palin, you are wrong.'” –Jay Leno

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“Sarah Palin had to have her campaign bus make an unscheduled stop at a Wal-Mart in Ohio, so she could pick up a package of diapers. I guess she ran out of diapers, so they pulled over and she went in and everyone followed her. Which is kind of cute, but it turned out Senator McCain didn’t need them.” –Jimmy Kimmel

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“Political experts are saying that to succeed in the vice presidential debate, Sarah Palin needs to show that she has the same concerns as everyday Americans. For instance, Palin planned to start the debate by saying she’s really troubled by John McCain’s choice for vice president.” –Conan O’Brien

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“The Republican Convention is under way. The theme for tonight’s Republican Convention is, ‘Who is John McCain?’ Tomorrow night’s theme is, ‘Who forgot to check if the Vice President’s daughter is pregnant?'” –Conan O’Brien

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Jokes Credit: These are just a few of the jokes compiled by Daniel Kurtzman, About.com’s Political humor guide. Way to go Dan! You can click this link to check out the rest of the McCain funnies.

And to top it off, a wacky video making fun of both candidates:

Happy Voting!